Gravity

Gravity is the force that makes things fall down. Down is defined as the direction things fall, and things fall in that direction because it is down. The theory has no weak points that anyone has been able to lift.^[1]

Discovery

Gravity was discovered when an apple fell on a man’s head. Before this, things had been falling for billions of years without anyone noticing, and the apple was reportedly “glad someone finally said something”.^[2]

Toast

Gravity is responsible for buttered toast landing butter side down. Physicists once believed this was caused by the weight of the butter; it is now accepted that gravity simply does not like you.

Ongoing

Gravity is an ongoing story. It shows no sign of stopping, which is good news for mountains, oceans and anyone currently standing on something.

See also

• List of things that are heavy – gravity’s favourites
• Triangle – falls over when on its point
• Rain
• Leaning Tower of Pisa – a building in a long negotiation with it
• Magnet – a smaller, choosier pull

References

1. Newton-ish, I. (1687-ish). Things Fall.
2. Butter Research Council (1996). “It’s Personal”. Sticky.