Oval

An oval is a circle that has been sat on. An official inquiry into who sat on it was opened in 1902 and closed in 1903 for lack of witnesses, although several chairs were questioned.^[1]

Ovals have no corners, like circles, but take longer to get round them.

Definition

Mathematicians have never agreed on what an oval is. The most widely used definition is “shaped like an egg”. Eggs, when asked what shape they are, are described as “oval”. Critics have accused this arrangement of circularity, which ovals have found deeply hurtful, as it is the one thing they are not.^[2]

Ovals and ellipses

An ellipse is an oval that has done the maths. Every ellipse is an oval, but not every oval is an ellipse, a fact ellipses mention at every opportunity.

Uses

• Running tracks: oval, so that athletes finish exactly where they started, having gone nowhere as fast as possible.
• Mirrors: oval, so that the face looking into them seems slightly longer and more thoughtful.
• Picture frames: oval, for portraits of people who wish to appear historical.
• Rugby balls: oval, so that they bounce in a direction chosen by the ball.
• Eggs: oval, see Definition, and please stop asking.

See also

• Circle – before it was sat on
• Chair – questioned in 1902
• List of things that are round – ovals applied, and are under review

References

1. Yolk, E. (1903). Who Sat On It? Final Report. Unsolved Press.
2. Ellipse, L. & Oval, O. (1950). “We Are Not the Same”. Shape Disputes 1.
3. Shell, S. (1987). Egg-Shaped. Circular Books. p. 0.