Leap day
Leap day is a spare day kept in storage and added to February every four years, when February isn’t looking.
Tomorrow
Tomorrow has never been reached; every expedition to it has arrived at today and been asked to wait.
Midnight
Midnight lasts no time at all, yet it is the most widely attended event on the calendar.
Noon
Noon lasts no time at all, so everyone who has ever said ‘it’s noon’ was wrong by the end of the word.
Week
A week is made of days, which are made of hours, which are made of weeks if you are waiting for a parcel.
Afternoon
The average afternoon contains 4.2 hours, 1.3 cups of tea and one person asking ‘is it only three?’
Saturday
Saturday is 24 hours long, officially; the public has measured it at nine hours and forty minutes.
Second
A second is one sixtieth of a minute, and has already ended by the time you finish reading this.
Yesterday
Yesterday is the day before today, and until midnight was known as today.
Friday
Friday can be detected as early as Tuesday afternoon, usually by whoever sits nearest the window.