White
White contains every colour at once, which is why it is the only colour that has never been asked to choose.
Rainbow
Walking towards a rainbow moves it away by exactly the distance walked, so it is always one step further.
Pink
Pink is red that was told to calm down and, after a long sit in some white, mostly has.
Beige
Beige is the colour walls go when nobody can agree, and it only exists while no one is looking at it.
Brown
Brown is the colour every other colour becomes if left in the paint-water jar long enough.
Orange
The fruit is named after the colour, which is named after the fruit; neither will say who started it.
Purple
Purple is made by mixing red and blue, both of whom deny being involved.
Green
Grass is greener on the other side; surveyors crossed 4,000 fences to check and are still crossing.
Yellow
Cowards are described as ‘yellow’; yellow has never responded to this, which critics say proves the point.
Grey
Grey is the colour between black and white, chosen by rocks and office carpets as the safe option.