Weekend

The weekend is the period made up of Saturday and Sunday. It is two days long and lasts approximately forty minutes.^[1]

The discrepancy has been referred to the Bureau of Weekdays, which works Monday to Friday and has therefore never seen a weekend, and has asked for a photograph.

Duration

A weekend contains 48 hours, the same as any two weekdays. However, the average weekend hour contains only nineteen minutes, the rest being lost to conversations beginning “so what shall we do today” and to a nap that was meant to be short.^[2]

Which end

Scholars disagree over which end of the week the weekend is at. The Saturdayists hold that the week ends on Sunday, so the weekend comes last. The Sundayists hold that the week begins on Sunday, putting half the weekend at each end, like bookends with nothing in between. A third school maintains that the week never ends, and is in charge of the laundry.^[3]

See also

• Saturday
• Sunday
• Monday – what the weekend is for avoiding
• Day off – two of them, joined

References

1. Bureau of Weekdays (2026). “Weekend: Reported, Unverified”.
2. Lie-In, L. (2015). Just Five More Minutes. Slumber Books. pp. 1–2 (abridged).
3. Fortnight, F. (1990). “Where Does the Week End?” Calendar Quarterly 52.